entrevista

So, Nicole over at Go Nicole Yourself! has been rocking an interview series for a while now, wherein friends and blog buddies of hers ask her interview questions, which she answers candidly and beautifully. She recently turned the tables and interviewed her friends.

So in lieu of a post about what is happening in my life right now (a lot is happening), I present to you my replies to her questions. May you be entertained.

What are your three most disgusting habits?

I am a paragon of ladylike virtue and have no disgusting habits.

What quality of mine do you wish you had? What quality of yours do you wish I had?

I wish I knew you well enough to answer this question. If I could bestow one of my qualities onto you, or onto anyone really, I think it would have to be the dimple. It is such a good conversation starter! Everyone's life would be more interesting with a dimple in their cheek.

Whose heart did you break the worst? What happened?

This is cheesy, but as far as I know the worst broken heart resulted from a summer camp romance. Matt and I had been flirting all summer out on Catalina Island at our little camp. On the night of the camp dance, one of the last nights, we sat together on the blue plastic picnic table and held hands. And on the boat ride back to the mainland, he fell for me. He said all the right 14-year-old-boy sweet nothings, and I swooned. But he went back to Phoenix, and I went back to LA, and I thought that was that. Matt, however, did not.

He commenced to sending me Hemingway-esque one page stories about love and loneliness; usually the envelopes were taped shut with duct tape. We would have these long, tearful late night conversations, him trying to convince me to love him, me feeling no such stirrings in my heart but not knowing how to extricate myself from the drama. (OK, sure, maybe I enjoyed all the attention, just a little bit.) The last straw was when he pledged to come to the same beach in Mexico that my family was going to over winter break, to give me diamond earrings. I called it off (whatever "it" was) pretty firmly at that point, although I was still nervous that I'd find him skulking around every corner on my vacation that year.

Anyway, I don't think I really broke his heart, truly -- I think he invented me in his mind, and fell in love with the girl he'd invented. Either way, somebody broke his heart.

Of course we found each other about ten years later on Friendster, and I think we're cool now.

What were the circumstances of your first real kiss?

I was maybe 15 or 16, and my boyfriend E was visiting me from Irvine, where he lived. (The first in a fruitless series of long distance relationships.) He was a surfer, his eyes were perpetually bloodshot, and he made fun of me because I used big words. But he was cute. And, I kinda stole him from my arch-nemesis at the time. (Well, not really stole him. But she was obviously crushing on him, and he liked me. And I felt just fine about that.)

So there we were on my bed, rolling around, doing God knows what. I knew it was about to happen. I was so excited, so nervous, so ... very unprepared for the slimy appendage that began probing my tonsils. I think I actually pulled back in shock and disbelief. We kept going for a while, but I couldn't wait for it to be over.

And that was the last time we hung out.

Do you feel strongly about the election this year? How has that changed from years prior and why are you voting for the candidate you support?

I voted for Obama in the primaries. I also, however, am deeply annoyed at what seems to be the fundamental basis for most people's aversion to Hillary: "she's a bitch," or other variations on that theme. Hillary is a strong, empowered, smart, tough woman. I don't know about you all, but those are the qualities I want in my president (to the extent that I believe that a national president is even a viable or useful office, which to tell you the truth, isn't that much).

I thought Obama's speech on race was one of the finest orations ever delivered in modern political discourse, and I admire him very much. However, the Jewish shtetl instinct in me is recoiling at the Jeremiah Wright/ Louis Farrakahn situation. I know Obama is distancing himself from that relationship, but still, lately I have been feeling uneasy about it. Moreover, I haven't heard any of the candidates say anything that actually moves me regarding environmental policy. 'Cause if we're all burnt to a crisp in 20 years, none of the other stuff matters much.

So, yes, I feel strongly about the election, in all kinds of ways. Obvs I'm not voting for McCain, but who knows; I might write in Bill Richardson, who was my candidate of choice to begin with.

Is there a moment in your life you'd like to take back or do over? What about it would you change?

Not one moment, really, but there are so many things I've said "no" to because of fear of failure. I'd like to go back to every single one of those moments -- whether it was a game of volleyball on the beach, or the time my college rabbi asked me to read from the Torah during Rosh Hashanah services, or any number of beautiful people who've wanted to get close to me -- and really assess the situation from a place of strength and courage. If I said no, I'd want the no to be coming from a place of confidence and belief that it was truly the right, healthy choice to say no. From that standpoint, I hope I would have said "yes" to a lot more moments.

Is there anyone in your past you wish you could say something to? Who would it be and why?

One time when I lived in New York, I got on the subway into a pretty empty traincar. I think it was in Brooklyn. I was wearing a long purple skirt and a black hoodie. You know how right when you walk into the train, there are two sets of seats that face the center of the train, while the rest of the seats are in rows? Ok, well, I sat down at the first seat in rows and put my feet up on the empty seat that was facing center. Can you picture it? I was kind of tucked into a corner.

There was a dude sitting in the center-facing seat across the way. He might have been the only other person in the car, or there might have been some other people at the far end. I don't remember. Anyway, this guy was wearing a black baseball cap and grey sweatpants. I didn't really pay too much attention to him, 'cause I was looking out the window (the train runs above-ground in Brooklyn sometimes). But soon enough I caught his reflection in the window, and I saw that he had his hand down his pants, and he was looking at me and masturbating.

I was horrified, so I got up and walked to the next car. I kind of looked at him disapprovingly, but I think I was too shocked to say anything. Actually, the feeling I felt was something like shame. As if it was my fault that this guy was basically violating my space. Classic victim mentality, right?

Well, I wish that I would have walked up to this guy, let myself feel some righteous rage, and said "FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE."

Why I would have said that? I would have said it to reclaim my space, to let this kid know that he can't disrespect women this way. But mostly, I would have said it so that I could hear my own voice, protecting me, knowing that what he was doing wasn't right and saying something about it.

I like to think that I'd have the strength to do that now.

What blogs do you read regularly and why?

I actually have about 30 blogs on Google Reader that I get excited to read. Nicole's, of course! And I've also become a regular reader of the other ladies on your list like Lori (way to get published!), Abby, Greenie, Amy, and Samantha. I can't get enough HippieChyck. I love to read about my oldest friend the Girly Auditor, when she posts. Simon Metz makes me laugh out loud. And of course, I wait for news from my dear high school homegirl who brought me into this bloggy universe, my darling Meeks.

I also read a lot of food blogs and a lot of enviro blogs.

Probably my favorite blog of all, though, is Gluten Free Girl. I wrote about that blog in my first post of this blog:

Shauna Ahern's Gluten-Free Girl is a paean to the overflowing deliciousness of existence. She discovered that she has celiac disease in 2005, and since that discovery her life has undergone an utter transformation -- as soon as she removed gluten from her diet, she gained a level of health and vitality previously unbeknownst to her. Since that pivotal moment, she has gone on to write a book (which I am about to read), connect with the love of her life, and continue to help and inspire thousands of people to find their own equilibrium through food.

I love reading Shauna, because Shauna loves. She adores the taste of food, and describes her culinary adventures with mouth-watering specificity. With her words, she brings each bite to life, conjuring up so vividly the mosaic of sensate delights which makes up her days. She also adores her husband Danny, "The Chef" -- the openness of their hearts, the freedom with which they utterly relish one another, the clarity of their twin souls together, is breathtaking. She adores her community, her craft, her world, her life, and that love is woven through every essay she composes and is evident in every photograph she takes. Shauna, to put it in a nutshell, says YES, and her blog has inspired me greatly.

What television shows do you watch that you won't admit to your friends?

I'm one of those obnoxious hippie-types without a television. Favorite television show of all time would have to be My So-Called Life.

What celebs are on your "list"?

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie come to mind.

Have you ever internet stalked? Who were you looking for and how did you do it?

Now that every single person I have ever known in my entire life is my friend on Facebook, internet stalking has really lost its magic.

If you're a blogger, what do you think is the best post you've ever written?

I just wrote one that, in a roundabout way, is on toxics in cosmetics, and I'm pretty proud of that one. The connections between reproductive health and environmental justice are starting to become more and more compelling to me, so my words on that topic are very passionate.

Fin!